Light hearted humour

Here are some programming jokes. I have included these to get a bit of light humour on the site. Some are actually quite funny.

There are only 10 kinds of people in this world: those who know binary and those who don't.

WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System

CD-ROM: Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months

MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers

Why computers are like men:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

Why computers are like women:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Last but not least:

What's the difference between drug dealers and computer programmers?

Drug Dealers	Computer Programmers
Refer to their clients as "users".	Refer to their clients as "users".
"The first one's free!"	"Download a free trial version…"
Have important South-East Asian connections (to help move the stuff).	Have important South-East Asian connections (to help debug the code).
Strange jargon: "Stick," "Rock," "Dime bag," "E".	Strange jargon: "SCSI," "RTFM," "Java," "ISDN".
Realize that there's tons of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market.	Realize that there's tons of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market.
Job is assisted by the industry's producing newer, more potent mixes.	Job is assisted by industry's producing newer, faster machines.
Often seen in the company of pimps and hustlers.	Often seen in the company of marketing people and venture capitalists.
Their product causes unhealthy addictions.	DOOM. Quake. SimCity. WOW. Everquest. 'Nuff said.
Do your job well, and you can sleep with sexy movie stars who depend on you.	Damn! Damn! DAMN!!!